Do you have African parents? If you try to cancel your wedding, be fully prepared to hear something like this.
But we all know marriage is a lifelong commitment. I would say if you are having doubts, don’t do it. It’s better you missed out an opportunity to be married to someone than for you to be stuck in a marriage you’re unhappy about.
So let us get down to business. How do you call off your wedding ceremony?
Method 1: I object!
This method only works if your wedding is really traditional. In such weddings, the priest is going to pause at some point and ask if there is anyone that objects to man and wife being joined in holy matrimony. This is where your friend comes in. It may be your sibling, maid of honor, groomsman, roommate or whoever. But it has to be someone sufficiently close to you to raise a red flag. The individual may give reasons such as the infidelity of your fiance, past relationships or long-term lack of alignment of goals. As tempting as this option may be people who want to evade personal pressure, the disadvantages in costs already spent, wasting people’s time and public humiliation are too great to make this a good choice for many.
Method 2: Call a family meeting
This seems straightforward enough. But don’t be fooled, it will be one of the most difficult things you ever have to do. Invite your family and your spouse’s family for a meeting. Butter them up first to get everyone in a good mood. Then begin the process of explaining to them all your reservations and fears going forward. Share of all these and seek counsel. If you are fortunate, solutions to all these issues will appear then and there. If you are much less fortunate, you just might damage relationships with everyone in the room. Either way, you will be at peace knowing you saved time, money and public embarrassment. Be sure to expect that Uncle Chukwuma who thought he was invited to drink beer and collect gifts will shout “Hay God!” though.
Method 3: Write a letter
This is the best method for people who dislike confrontation. Write several letters to your fiance, parents, friends and family members detailing all your reasons for deciding not to go through with the marriage. Apologize to them and seek their forgiveness. Before sending this letter, ensure that all logistics are sorted out e.g cancel the hotel reservation, cancel the caterer and live band, return the dowry, etc. Just to smoothen the process and make it easier for them to accept your decision. It is best to stay away for a few weeks after this and think through your decision so you can move forward with your life. Hopefully when you return, you will be accepted with open arms.
So there you have it. Did you call off your wedding? Reach out to us, we want to know how it went. And do well to follow us on Twitter!
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